The Secret Diary of Steve Jobs - Latest Comments in Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

girish — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 10:40:35 -0000

wow!

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

lastangelman — Sun, 11 May 2008 08:52:22 -0000

There's one reason, and one reason only why Microsoft should buy Facebook - Sheryl "Fangs-a-lot" Sandberg. Or hire her away from Facebook as Steve Ballmer's replacement.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Partners in Grime — Sun, 04 May 2008 20:56:20 -0000

Looks like you're right again, Fake Steve.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

playitcool — Fri, 02 May 2008 18:58:02 -0000

Word for the day for you my friend: Correctard.

Dude, relax and let the enema do its job.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

zahadum — Thu, 01 May 2008 22:28:08 -0000

word for the day: "FACTARD"

1) newsflash @ playitcool: "jane, you ignorant slut!" as they used to say on SNL 1.0 ... if your grade school math skills are any indicator, then you wont worry about graduating from harvard - you couldnt even get in to harvard!

any future 128bit O/S will not "run out" of time (pace Y2K) because 128bits of seconds is (16 million trillion times) longer than the physical existence of the universe itself!

the year 6221 is only ~100B seconds from now (4K years x 24Msecs/Y), which barely exceeds the capacity of 32bit address space (2^32 vs 2^36) .... in fact 64bits will be entirely adequate for keeping time (at 1000B years) even if this spawn-of-satan super O/S will measure the 'wall clock' in milliseconds (however, for scientific calculations that can't use the 'wall clock', the 80bit double-precision that is already available in this millennium does the job).

2) playitcool's counting problems seem to extend beyond the calendar: basic marketshare data also seems to elude him ...

At current run-rate growth, the mac's (us retail) marketshare for consumers is already heading towards 20% and its business presence is pointing towards 10% over the next couple of years.

I apologize for a nit-picky post - i realize this reality-based approach violates the whole ethos of FSJ's blog! ...

but what are we supposed to do with 'FACTARDS' like playitcool?! ... just let them go on living in their delusional bubble? ... dont we have an obligation to help them from hurting themselves (or worse, innocent by-standers) with sharp pointy things like facts?!

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

pope — Sat, 09 Feb 2008 18:36:36 -0000

superboring LSD buddhism driven shit:
"I love beautiful objects. I love creating them. Negative people upset me. " go and get a flat with steve seagal and sting

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

joby866 — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 19:44:30 -0000

Lmao! Who's asking who for help?

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

theoxygenthief — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 16:08:21 -0000

Nice Touch linking to Yahoo finance info :-)

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

common sense — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 07:24:14 -0000

developers, developers, developers!

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Mark Sigal — Wed, 06 Feb 2008 19:45:57 -0000

This deal is the icing on the cake moment when the "market maker" baton is irrevocably passed from Microsoft to Google.

While the Microsoft economy remains huge, and will do so far into the future (as was the case with IBM before it), there can be little doubt that Microsoft is now chasing the tail of the big dog.

Some quickie analysis in 'The Market Maker & The Information Economy: http://thenetworkgarden.com/weblog/2008/02/the-...

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Matt — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 18:47:18 -0000

Why does everyone think Google is just a better search engine. Personally, I think google succeeds for two reasons.

1. People have muscle memory in their fingers to type g o o g l e . c o m
2. There are no distractions on the home search page.

That's it. If somehow microsoft and google changed domain names and initial look, Microsoft would win.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

TomMassey — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 15:00:01 -0000

Agreed, amazing analysis.

I also have to say FSJ use of metaphors and analogies also truly amazing. It is what makes this Blog enjoyable to read. I have this vision looping in my brain of trying to keep two mating elephants on a skateboard. This is how to make the craft of analysis come alive and be read -- dare I say enjoyed.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

DougS — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 11:42:19 -0000

In the immortal words of Admiral Akhbar: "It's a trap!"

The louder Google howls about the deal, the harder Microsoft will push to get it done. Not only will the delays hurt two of its biggest rivals, once the deal is consummated, it will further distract said rivals as they puzzle over how they're actually going to make this ill-conceived marriage work.

The fact that Microsoft admits that it will have to go into debt to acquire Yahoo! is that stuns me. The dragon's hoard of cash has always been a sign of strength for them, as well as for Apple. The fact that they're willing to piss it all away on one deal is a sign of desperation, not strength. It makes them look very weak, and it will hurt their balance sheet in both the near- and medium-term.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

glinko — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 07:30:27 -0000

I am an ex-msft-ee from the earlier days. You are right pretty much all the way around. However, the main issue is not that Microsoft engineers CAN'T make a great search engine or advertising platform. It's that the corporate culture at Microsoft is Jurassic Park-like; a tech park gone wild, so that good ideas are lost in bloody battles among clans, and it's "every man for himself." Despite what wall street thinks, Yahoo! is creating good stuff and getting it out there on a regular basis. It's News and Finance sites are #1 on the entire Internet. And that's with bad management. Imagine what it could do with good management. Microsoft will kill Yahoo! like Time Warner did to AOL. Ballmer only wants the advertising platform, the rest can be tossed aside because, well, they already have msn.com (yikes!). Oddly enough, I'm a MSFT and YHOO shareholder and I'm rooting for Yahoo! Earth to Yang: Don't assimilate!!!

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Steve — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 05:08:36 -0000

Simple - because they can - and would be stupid not to keep the whole circus spinning for as long as possible.

Every day that MicroWho? get stalled on this is two days gained for big G. The longer it takes for this mess to be revealed for what it is, the happier (and richer) they'll be. (FSJ, great post - almost forgot!)

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

upshaw — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 04:48:06 -0000

You are an anti-semite (ballmer is a jew).

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Bharath K — Tue, 05 Feb 2008 04:20:53 -0000

Great one FSJ. This is just the sort of article that compels me to read your blog daily. Keep it up!

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

J.R. "Bob" Dobbs — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 23:04:30 -0000

Ballmer looks (and behaves) exactly like the MONSTER from Mel Brooks' "Young Frankenstein".

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

faddah — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 22:01:05 -0000

can you say, aol-time-warner?" you know, that big ass merger that was s'posed to challenge microsquish dominance and help netscape come back and win the browser wars? we all see how well that worked out, eh? they're now talking about spinning off aol as its own business, and aol was the purchaser in the original merger. tall about taking it in the shorts. thus deal, if it does go through? expect it to go much the same way.

sheeeeeeeee-zus. it's like no one even remembers fairly recent history, even, anymore. I guess you're right fsj - no one reads anymore. except maybe rv guide, on-line. the more things change, the more the stay the same, an' all that ...

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

bratling — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 21:19:56 -0000

Fake Steveie is back and bigger and badder than ever! This is why I read this blog, Steve. Not that photo caption and Ellison crap. (Well, okay, maybe a little of that Ellison crap.)

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Catfish — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 19:45:27 -0000

I just blogged about this today. Without further innovation and less focus on bottom line accounting, MSN / Yahoo (Mahoo) will never catch Google..

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

playitcool — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 18:42:20 -0000

Mac buys Adobe, Microsoft buys MacAffee, and eventually, in the year 2096, Microsoft acquires Mac through corporate espionate, bribery, and lack of popular support for Mac OS.

It's the year 6221, the universe's computer systems, including interstellar navigation, goes into a frenzy because Mac-dobe-Affee-Microsoft-ahoo! Corporation says 128-bit only counts so many seconds from Jan 1, 1970.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

hob — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:55:30 -0000

Maybe Ballmer hasn't forgotten his idea of driving companies together to beat them.

The Register is now reporting that Yahoo is asking Google for help !

This means that Ballmer knows that noone wants Mahoosoft, but if he drives Google and Yahoo together, there will be mass rejoicing for a whilst, followed by mass confusion within their two companies for months whilst they work out the logistics. Meanwhile, he can unleash phase 2! (whatever that might be)

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

nichevo — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 16:38:23 -0000

I wasn't aware that was not true, at the time. The problem was, there was apparently no G6, G7, G8, G9, G10...and so on, in the works, that could be relied upon. The time to sell out is at the top of the market. Flog the Moto chip line till it ends and then move over before the Law of Diminishing Returns hits.

MSFT might like to learn that lesson. Their code base is circling the drain. At least, its heart has skipped a beat, a big fat multibillion-dollar beat. Vista = FAIL. That was not the plan. I should think it was not an option. But people are derating, decrementing, degrading from Vista to XP, even if they have to pay more.

I think it's kind of like that old joke: Rendered below in haiku format:

Yeah, sure, I am fat

But you are ugly (/stupid)

And I can diet.

Re: Ballmer: I'm completely out of ideas

Pierpont Morgan — Mon, 04 Feb 2008 15:53:08 -0000

and the Pointey-Haired Boss from Dilbert.